Best Zombie Jokes - Funniest Walking Dead Jokes

Below is my list of favorite zombie - walking dead jokes. Yes, many of them are bad.

The baby zombie asked her mother “Mommy, do I have daddy’s eyes?” The mother zombie said “Yes you do. Now eat them before they get cold!”

A lawyer, cheerleader, and a zombie walk into a bar…
A few hours later, the lawyer, cheerleader, and zombie walk back out of the bar.
How did the lawyer and cheerleader survive?
Zombies only eat people with brains.

Q: Why did the zombie comedian get booed off stage?
A: Because the jokes he told where rotten.

Q: What's a zombies favorite bean?
A: A human-bean.

Q: Why was the zombie afraid to cross the road?
A: He didn't have the GUTS!

Q: Why don't zombies eat comedians?
A: They taste FUNNY!

Q: What is the safest place to be in a zombie apocalypse?
A: The living room.

Q: Where do zombies eat dinner?
A: The LIVING room!

Q: What did the zombie order at the club?
A: A shot of To-KILL-Ya!

Q: What would "The Walking Dead" be called if it was written by George Lucas?
A: Scab Wars.

Q: Why did the zombie lose his lawsuit?
A: He had NO LEG to STAND ON!

Q: What's a zombies favorite desert?
A: I-Scream!

Q: Did you hear about the vegan Zombie?
A: He went to the insane asylum and only ate the vegetables!

Q: What is a zombie's favorite mode of transportation?
A: SCAREplanes!

Q: How can you tell when a Zombie is sick?
A: By their coffin.

Q: What do you get when you cross a zombie with a snowman?
A: FrostBITE!

Q: What do you call an extremely well dressed Zombie?
A: Dressed to kill.

Q: What do you call a zombie pollster?
A: A DEAD ringer!

Q: What do vegetarian zombies crave?
A: GRAAAINS.....

Q: Why can you always find a zombie at Subway?
A: Because they like to "Eat Flesh".

Q: What is the highest form of compliment you can give a Zombie?
A: You look to be in grave condition.

Q: Why did the zombie do good on the test?
A: Because it was a no brainier!

Q: Did you hear about the zombie who was expelled from school?
A: He kept BUTTERING up his teacher!

Q: What is a zombie's favorite mode of transportation?
A: A blood vessel

Q: What do you call a bee that never dies?
A: A zomBEE!

Q: What do zombies say before a fight?
A: Do you want a PIECE of me?

Q: What do you call zombies that can't run?
A: The Walking Dead

Q: How did the zombie treat every day of death?
A: Like he was LIVING!

Q: What do zombies do at a wedding?
A: Toast the bride and groom.

Q: What time do zombies wake up?
A: At ATE o'clock!

Q: Why did the zombie go crazy?
A: He had lost his mind!

Q: How do zombies keep their hair in place?
 A: With SCARE spray!

Q: Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers?
A: No, they eat the fingers separately

Q: What type of dogs do zombies like to eat?
A: BLOODhounds!

Q: How do zombies serve their country?
A: In the Marine CORPSE!